I want to be intoxicated with my own make-believe happiness.
I want to laugh to my heart's desire and hear its hollowness.
I want to smile with pride though inside I feel no warmth.
Just let me be able to put on a happy face.
For others to see that i am not bothered when i am.
For them to see that i can survive when i hardly can.
For them to believe that life is one big joke when the joke is on me.
Allow me to pretend.
For i can no longer bear myself without hurting.
Such a need to laugh without the thrilling note of happiness.
Such that i need to smile without feeling its radiant glow inside.
Such that i may live a little longer in this place where only few survive.
if there is something that i learned about friend then it is that the most cheerful one in the group is the most sadness .And believe me who is smiling like this only heart himself .
ReplyDeleteWhat I learned from my live is to Cry when it's time to cry and laugh when it's time to laugh ,before its to late .
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I cry. Only when i'm alone. When no one is around. In the face of majority I appeared happy the way I am eventhough an urge of sadness is me. I have a lot more entry to share but i don't find a way on how would i suppose to post it. Despite of, some of my entry @ http://mywap.ph which is a mobile wap community has been cloned in the web.. :) But much of the guts i'm happy.. .the way they share it although some of the lines have been modified. This entry was created last 2009.
ReplyDelete